1. |
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“it’s over now” you said to me
“the wise men decided you’re not needed”
just my echoes spread over dusty shelves
and in the books your grandfather’s reading
then I felt the ground begin a-trembling
where I’d been left to die
you dragged me out of the undergrowth
and all I heard were screams and cries
i wish that i’d died in the 1990s
stifled by the weight of history
i wish that i’d died in the 1990s
‘cause the sunlight on my pillow
has turned to flames licking at my window
and there’s no rest ’til your last breath sets me free
pain and war, they’re a mystery
i just do the telling
the winners with the biggest words
i just do their bidding
cloths of blue, or red or gold
i’ll wear whatever you wish
i’ll choreograph the crowd, feel their fury rise
or lead the lonesome dying steps of madness
i wish that i’d died in the 1990s…
the price you pay goes on climbing high
and the price of a life keeps on falling
so clench your teeth in pain or victory
i’m not loyal when schemes go wrong
the valley walls are steep and high
i’m close behind and running strong
i wish that I’d died in the 1990s…
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2. |
Wonderful Song
04:50
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i walked beneath dividing boughs
the avenue of planes
tamed and transplanted
to city fumes and rain
just echoes of the sunlight left
now autumn has turned
surrender to the leaf mould
as the golden fires burn
we come tonight to seek repair
in fantasy and dreams
the orchards of my past rise up
and we play our familiar scenes
i’m burning for your touch
i’m yearning at the core
but your smile delays what i want to say
till you’re not there any more
who wants to talk if the time’s always wrong?
who wants to dance when their feet are too long?
i want to play but i’m just too dull
say, why don’t we sing…
… isn’t this song wonderful?
dragged on by the hungry current
no place to pick a fight
waiting to capsize
to swim with all your might
to swim with all my might
would be a rare and blessed release
the musculature’s degraded
but the skin above’s still sleek
who wants to talk if the time’s always wrong?...
the grey wash of the dawn
dissolves the corners and the lines
embalming what we cannot grasp
but can never leave behind
the sombre cry of the night bird
flying to roost in the branchy peaks
we’re left to tread the shady path
round piles of rotting leaves
who wants to talk if the time’s always wrong?...
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3. |
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the chapel was crowded, the people all in it
had come out of duty, or friendship, or both
the man they remembered had long since departed
distorted by sickness, deserted by hope
thanks for the good times and fond recollections
all jostled for space in the minds of those there
but their gratitude should flow in a different direction
to the star of the show, as the vicar declared:
“god is drying his tears in heaven”
(all suffering has ended)
“god is drying his tears in heaven”
(into his arms we bound)
“god is drying his tears in heaven”
the natural conclusion:
you’re not safe from comfort
till you’re six feet underground
so who is this big boy with kleenex a-plenty?
who is this big man muscling in?
where was he when pain made the body unbearable?
only appearing when the vicar begins:
“god is drying his tears in heaven”
(all suffering has ended)
“god is drying his tears in heaven”
(into his arms we bound)
“god is drying his tears in heaven”
despite all your plans:
you’re not safe from comfort
till you’re ash in the can
one day we’ll join him in lifeless oblivion
one day we’ll frolic like babes in the clouds
our faithful hearts sated with milk and with honey
and these words of comfort will be spoken out loud
“god is drying his tears in heaven”
(all suffering has ended)
“god is drying his tears in heaven”
(into his arms we bound)
“god is drying his tears in heaven”
the natural conclusion:
you’re not safe from comfort
till you’re six feet underground
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4. |
Café Culture
04:03
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we sat in the café and stared at the walls
as i cast about in my mind for some words
that my mouth could manage to form
with the wit and vitality of conversationalists like me
it’s a wonder the world goes round at all - yes it is
it’s a wonder that the world goes round at all
retreating to the bathroom i took shelter in a stall
and i prayed to the gods of the cistern for assistance
suspecting they’d seen it all
just the latest in a lengthy line of fearful hearts quite like mine
one day i’ll break the mould and say the truth - yes I will
one day i’ll break the mould and say the truth
let me speak your name
give me that look that means you think the same
and cut loose the vultures
of this café culture
returning to the table i tried to copy my friends’ positions
and my efforts to be easy were much more pleasing
and encountered less resistance
would you could you in a boat? what’s your favourite Norman castle moat?
there’s a world outside that sticking steamed-up door - yes there is
there’s a world outside that sticking steamed-up door
let me speak…
my best efforts aren’t sufficient, so to my fate I am resigned
your smile is selective, you’re so cool and collected
and i’m impulsive and ill-defined
now the waiter wants the table and another chance has gone
but this picture of affliction will linger on - yes it will
this picture of affliction will linger on
let me speak…
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5. |
Living For Two
04:12
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in the shelter of the hawthorn hedge
the rosehip and the thorn
looking out across the meadowgrass
where our decade lies forlorn
and the winter sun’s cautious touch
holds a promise of warmth to come this year
but i’m living for two from now on
in this meadow of tears
beneath december’s salmon skies
the blackbirds' anxious call
though the twilight settles sombrely
they’ll be back to sing at dawn
with abundant life a sad surround
lies the reason we’re gathered round: the nightmare we all feared
so i’m living for two from now on
in this meadow of tears
...
may you rise up in a heady mist
may your molecules be freed
let each individual one be kissed
and dance joyful on the breeze
and my heart has been commandeered
by a stream of conviction running clear
that i’m living for two from now on
i guess i'm living for two from now on
yes i'm living for two from now on
in this meadow of tears
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6. |
Changes On Me
04:14
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i was hanging round and lost for so long
could never feel like i belonged
then a hand appeared one day
and you welcomed me in to stay
so through the years we danced and twirled
the attendant feelings steamed and swirled
now your movement lives in my limbs
feel your growing pulse within
keep heaping those changes on me
heaping those changes on me
keep heaping those changes
and i won’t let go
so who was i? well i think that you knew
long before i shared what i had thought through
so patient while i stumbled on
you stuck with me all along
but now there’s a darkness that's taken hold
the bleakest anarchy of my soul
a storm rips me from the ground
- god knows where it’s going to lay me down
keep heaping those changes…
what a beautiful chance and you let me take it
i’m so glad of your kindness in helping me make it
i was lost with my heart on the floor
wearing patterns in the carpet round my bedroom door
the mind games to get through the day
we just threw them away
threw them all away
so wherever it leads that’s where i will be
a stranger to myself, a blissful relief
these days i’m just leaning in
i can feel you near when i sing
we’re torn apart but some things never end
a depth to your care i can’t comprehend
it comes blazing through the night
and i'm shimmering in your light
keep heaping those changes…
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